Ain't no thang.

This past week has been stressful in terms of what's been happening with my hair color. I got the black stripped out, and whenever you do that, your hair turns orange. This time, the final product still had a shit-ton of orange in it. And I wasn't havin' it. So I went back the next day and got it "re-toned" and now it looks something like this:

Please ignore my paleness/makeup under the eyes/overall disgusting that is my face.

I'm happy with the color (for now hehe) but I am even happier about the fact that I have half the money for my weave saved. :D Oh long, illustrious hair that I dream of, you will soon be mine.

You know how there's always that one person that "got away"? The one person you never had? You almost did, but they somehow slipped through your fingers (if you want to interpret that as dirty, by all means do so) and you can't forget it? Well I've got one of those. Let's call him "Fred". I see Fred on a regular basis, and he's almost like a brother to me now, and actually IS a brother to one of my readers (but I'm pretty sure she knew exactly who I was talking about kinda instantly). The problem with people who play this role in your life is that you are constantly wishing you hadn't have let them get away in the first place. But how do you get over it? You have 2 options; forget this person and replace the thought that you should've had them way back when with the idea that it wasn't ever supposed to be. OR you can try to get back to where you were in the first place, but this time choose NOT to let that opportunity go. The problem is...which option do I go with? And I don't want you to think that I'm imagining this and that it's just false hope that's all in my head, even though I have no idea where Fred and I stand today. I just know that it should've been. But never was.

This is my final day of "childhood". I'm not sure how I feel about being an adult just yet, but I know that it comes with a lot of responsibilities and freedoms. I'm excited to get my tattoo on Sunday, but I'm not really excited to do anything else that being 18 will permit me to do. I almost don't want to be 18...there's something I certainly treasure about being a "kid". Even though I hated being 17...and 16...probably 15, and we won't even talk about 14, I like the glimmer of impressiveness that being under 18 brings with anything you achieve. 18 is still young, but it's not AS young. I'm sure I'll get over it real quick, but for now, I'm a little disappointed it's coming to an end. I guess I'll just have to be impressive in other ways. :P

HOT- boys wearing glasses.

NOT- the fact that I can't say "boys" wearing glasses is hot once I'm 18. Pedophile doesn't look good on me.

-Shelby <3

I'll fly with you, Nick Jonas!

I have honestly had so many chances to update this thing over the past 2 weeks, but haven't. A few interesting things have happened....

1. I went to a hair extensions consultation, was super happy and pumped up, got told they were gonna cost me $1300, asked for them for my birthday, mom said no, dreams were crushed.
2. I threw my back out...AGAIN. Back to physical therapy for me.
3. I had the most sister-focused dinner at my dad and stepmom's that ever existed in history. My dad blatantly said, "Kate you look so good. I don't know if it's your hair or your makeup, or what. Melissa (step...mother...thing), doesn't Kate just look great?" NOT EXAGGERATING AT. ALL.
4. Re-connected with a friend I hadn't spoken with in months.
5. I saw Paranormal Activity and got the shit scared out of me. Not really, but it was way too suspenseful. I'm going again tonight!

Since my dreams of being Audrina's hair clone are far off now, I can merely save my paychecks each month in hopes of one day looking as lovely. The woman who does my hair offered to give them to me for $800, so I only have to wait about a month before I can get them. My whole world came crashing down, I kid you not, when I heard I couldn't have them for my birthday. I am in no means a spoiled brat, but when it comes to my hair, if it's not how I want it, I feel extremely self conscious and awkward. But waiting a month is not the end of the world. I'm getting my hair colored on Tuesday, because Hollister is threatening to not give me hours if I continue to have my hair black and red. I honestly do not care what Hollister thinks/says, but I need to work.

I have never discussed my manager in this blog, because we're friends on facebook and I fear he'll read it, but for those of you who follow me on Twitter, and know me IRL, you know what I say about him. I asked him if I could transfer to Abercrombie and Fitch in Horton Plaza, the mall downtown, and he said, "No." I asked why, and he responded with, "Because I won't transfer you." They pay $9 an hour there, instead of the exceedingly MINIMUM minimum wage I get at Hollister, and it's right by my hair school, so it would be a solid plan to work there. Yet, my manager claims, "I like having you here too much." Of course, I instantly wordvomit, "Ohyeahokay." This is the power he holds over me. Damn those bulging biceps and illegal display of pectoral superiority. I cannot disobey.

My birthday is rapidly approaching. One week from now, I will no longer be a teenager. I'll probably reflect on my teenage years in the next post, but for now, I can just say that I had a very interesting ride. Some friends and I got into some pretty sketchy activities, truly putting our badassity to the test. Nothing like drugs or anything like that. Just some...illegal happenings occurred, and I certainly felt the aftermath. I believe I'm much wiser now, and my illegal past will remain a past. But boy, did we have fun.

I now have to go get ready to pee myself yet again in Paranormal Activity. I didn't actually lose control of my bladder, nor was it genuinely that scary, it was just so real, and it messed with my head. I pondered sleeping with a cross last night. Seriously. It made me scared to not be on a first name basis with my buddy JC up there.

HOT- Nick Jonas. I feel like I've said this before, but oh my. I watched 'Jonas' the other day...I forget how incredibly attractive he is. I often want to be single until I meet my own Nick Jonas. That sounds strange, but Victoria I know you understand. There is just no comparison. There really isn't. God damn I'm shallow.

^I know it's the same picture twice, but you need to take a look at the arm veins. Adjhkajsdhakjsdhaaaa. ahh.

NOT- Demi Lovato's ass chin.

-Shelby <3

You're all chrome.

October is FINALLY here! The weather today was AMAZING. It was all chilly and windy and I was legitimately cold all day long. I love Fall. I went and bought a bunch of delicious smelling candles, and my room smells like a pumpkin pie doused with cinnamon and apple amazingness. And 3 weeks exactly until my birthday!

Today was oddly productive. I re-organized my entire closet, cleaned my room (and if you've seen my room, you know this is not a simple task), and went to Whole Foods and bought Norwegian cod liver oil for my skin, and this vitamin that makes my hair grow at alarming rates. I also decided to get rid of the red peekaboo. Hollister won't give me hours if I continue to have a red chunk in my hair, and it's like a weird orange color now anyway.

Sometimes I want to just take all my piercings out and dye my hair back to it's normal color. I know I've said that before, but I'm really going to now. I don't want any more piercings, and I don't want any "epic" tattoos for the world to see. Sleeve dream, gone. I still want the bird tattoo, just a small one on my wrist with small words, instead of it spanning my entire upper forearm. I've come to realize that black hair/eyeliner and piercings is a teenage phase, and I don't want tattoos anymore. I'll keep my wrist piercings because I think they're cute and original, but no more. I want long, pretty, normal colored hair, and to wear nicer clothes, not skinny jeans and vans, or everything tight. I see myself in the future, and that's how I'd like to look. No more black hair, even though I felt like it's "me" and I feel much better with black hair than anything "normal". I'd like to go back to blonde at some point. But not until my hair is longer. It can't take anymore dying at this point. Well, it could...but I'd rather not. I used to want so badly to stand out, but I realize I can stand out with my appearance by just being myself, and with how I present myself, not by my hair color/clothes.

Another realization...I enjoy watching The Hills. I kind of only originally did for the clothes and hair, but lately it's been kind of entertaining. I want Audrina's hair. I love her sense of style in general, and strangely, her hair usually looks like a rats nest, but recently it's been looking quite nice.

I love the color. Speaking of hair, I'm scheduled for an extensions consultation this Tuesday, because I want some legittt ones for my birthday. My hair is currently black, but I want them to be similar to Audrina's color. I'm also over being pale. It's kinda gross right now. I don't want to tan outside anymore because skin cancer is like, a major fear of mine, so tanning booth visit? I think yes. Never been. Gotta be done.

Tonight is Tool Academy 2 and the Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami finale! I need a life outside of these tv shows. Seriously.

HOT- "Heads Will Roll" by Yeah Yeah Yeahs. It was on a promo for The Hills...lol.

NOT- My best friend, my sister, NOR my boyfriend read this blog. TALK ABOUT A BURN.

-Shelby <3

EDIT: OH LORD. This is my 27th post! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH.